"Dickhead"

On the first day of the gauntlet my customers gave to me: A fattie digging in my trash can.

He just so happened to be standing right on the other side of the window from where I was standing, so I calmly tapped on the glass and pointed to the sign reading "DO NOT DIG IN TRASH"

"FUCK YOU I DROPPED MY PHONE IN THERE DICKHEAD!!!" the man roars. It's maybe 5am, and there are residences adjacent to our lot.

"...how the f... how did it fall in there?" I ask, but I receive no reply. The man just glares at me and starts storming towards the door and, finally, enters.

"DO YOU THINK I JUST DIG AROUND IN GARBAGE FOR FUN? FUCK YOU. FUCK. YOU."

"Well, you were digging in the trash." My frown started to fade away. Finally, after a boring night, something interesting.

"I TOLD YOU I DROPPED MY PHONE IN THERE YOU FUCKING RETARD!"

"Ok, alright, well you have my sincere apologies," I smiled. The other customers watched, not moving.

Tubby stomped towards the back of the store, grabbed a small bottle of milk and, gigantic man boobs jiggling, stomped back to the counter where he proceeded to slam it down. That was a lot of glaring going on. This man was PISSED that I would EVER try to enforce any rules upon him.

"Will this be everything for you today?" I beamed. This confused him. I could see it in his beady, pig-like eyes.

"Yeah... I guess."

"Awesome. Debit or credit? Alright. Aaaannnd... You're set! Hey thanks much, man. You have yourself a good one!" One spoon full of sugar... two spoonfuls... Oh fuck it, 6.2 metric tons, please.

"uh... k." he muttered, his squinty little pig eyes turned to the floor as he took his milk and left. This man was completely transparent. He had no justifiable reason to be angry with me. Even after I spoke my first words, sounding like I didn't care that he just yelled at me, it was readily apparent that he was starting to feel like a real bastard.

By the time he left, though? I think I ruined his entire day, thus constituting a small victory on my part.

Oh, and I arm wrestled a Vietnam Vet who's covered in more scars than I've probably seen on all the people in my life combined up to this point. You damn well better believe he won, but I put up an ok fight. I'm still pretty impressed an old man like him could so soundly trounce a whipper-snapper like myself, though. That man is strong.